It’s been ten months since the birth of my baby girl, but I have never written her birth story. I wish I would have written it earlier as I would have probably remembered more although that time was stressful. I probably wouldn’t have been able to reflect and gather my thoughts if I had wrote it then. I never thought I would share this, but I am excited too as my girl is a strong little one ❤
On January 12th my baby girl Alison was born. The birth wasn’t what I expected, but I am proud of how I handled it. My only view of birth or pregnancy was through the media. It really isn’t as glamours as it is made out to be.. wish I would have known that before! My baby’s due date was January 29th. I always had a feeling that she would be early, but I didn’t know why. On the first week of January I started feeling a bit weird. Itchy weird. I was itchy everywhere, but mostly my hands and feet. I went to google and googled what it could be (I probably googled things over a million times) and found out that it could be Obstetric Cholestasis. I was pretty scared, but ignored it for a few days in hopes that the itching would go away but it didn’t. On Saturday January 9th I went to Royal Columbian with my mom to see if it was a possibility. A couple hours later a nurse came in telling me I had to come in tomorrow to be induced. I was completely shocked. – I didn’t even have my hospital bag ready or the playpen set up but it was time. I knew about induction from my prenatal class. I’m so glad that I attended that because it actually helped me in the moments leading to birth.
The next day I went in before noon and got my first induction. They first used the gel and monitored my contractions. I believe they also gave me some through an IV. They gave me some pain meds and sent me home and told me to come back until I was in active labour. I was in pain, but it wasn’t anything like the active labour I would experience in a couple days. Sunday was a long day and I believe I went to the hospital again but was sent home. I had a bath at home and had some dinner before going to bed early. I slept through the entire night without any pain or interruption which was weird for me. I wasn’t in any pain and things weren’t progressing. I called the hospital and we went back that Monday morning. I was induced again with more gel this time. I was also sent home after this and came backs sometime in the afternoon.
We were going to be sent home again as I wasn’t dilating very much. I believe it was around 5 or 6 and we were waiting for a doctor to check to see how dilated I was now. The nurse tried, but they couldn’t figure it out so we were waiting for a doctor. Can I just say checking to see how dilated you are hurts more than birth. Gosh it was terrible. Anyhow, the doctor was in a c-section pregnancy and it was taking longer than expected. Hours went by and the pain kept getting worse. I had laughing gas, which actually did make me laugh and helped a bit.. but when the back pain started I knew that I wouldn’t be able to give birth naturally. I was so against getting any pain meds, but learning about it more made it more of a possibility. Around 9 we finally got sent to a birthing room. I was in so much pain I don’t remember how I got there. I remember attempting to take a shower before the epidural came, but it didn’t help at all. When I got the epidural I felt as though I was going to pass out. I was in so much pain from the contractions and my back felt like it was going to break. Everything was blurry for me and I saw black spots. Once I had the epidural I felt much better. I was able to relax and get some sleep.
I slept for a couple hours and woke up around 11:30. I woke up thinking ‘man I need to shit’ and I told the nurse i needed to poop. All she said was “NO” and said to wait and not to push. Tyler woke up excited now and my mom was also thrilled. My birth plan was to just have Tyler in the room for the birth, but I realized I needed more support than that. My mom and dad were both there and I’m glad they were. The birth was filmed (which i never thought i would do) but I am glad I have that memory. I waited about 5-10 and then my doctor arrived. Thank goodness. The doctor that gave birth to me gave birth to my daughter and I will always treasure that. I stating pushing around 11:40. It was the strongest I have ever felt. It was such a surreal experience. When I first walked into the maternity ward I heard screaming. I thought for sure I would scream in pain, not able to continue, but I didn’t scream once. I felt like such a strong bad ass. I listened to my doctor, pushed when I needed to, and breathed when I needed to. It honestly felt like forever, but when you see a head down there.. An overwhelming feeling comes over you and you just have this instinct to get this baby out. When her head was out enough my doctor realized the cord was wrapped around her neck. Which I never really expected at all. I couldn’t push and she cut the cord while she was still inside me. I wanted delayed cord clamping so badly, but that wasn’t an option anymore. Ali’s life was. She came out shortly after she cut the cord and she was quickly placed onto me. I saw but in a blink of an eye she was gone. It was silent. There wasn’t crying and I thought I heard someone say “she isn’t breathing.” The nurse called for more help and there were tons of nurses. I laid on the bed alone while I watched everyone try to revive my baby across the room. I didn’t know it would happen like that. I didn’t get the first picture with all the gunk still on her as I wanted. It was so scary. I left alone unaware of what was happening. Tyler told me “it’s okay” and in that moment you feel as though it is. It’s what you learn after the birth months later which is the scary part, but I won’t get to that. Anyhow, which seemed like hours Alison finally took her first breath. They weighed her (5lbs 9oz❤️️) and finally was able to hold my baby. I wanted skin to skin. Before she was placed on my chest we decided she was born at 12:37. Which I thought was funny because you really just guess the time since no one is really paying that much attention to the clock. When I finally got to see her it was so surreal. She looked up at me and was so calm. It was such a beautiful moment and I realize I created this beautiful human. It really is amazing what the human body could do.
Giving birth has made me realize things don’t go as planned. Sometimes you don’t get the picture of her right after birth. Sometimes the unexpected happens. Sometimes it isn’t all glamours. No matter how my pregnancy and birth experience was for me I wouldn’t change a thing. I am so thankful for my doctor and the nurses who helped my baby girl. She is so strong and I knew she would get through this. I never thought I would have to experience that, even for my first baby and I’m not going to lie it has scared me. Birth is such a miracle and but when something goes wrong it’s as if times stops. All I can do now is look back and be proud. Proud of how I handled things.. Proud of my strength and Alison’s. Everything was meant to happen as it did and I’m so happy with how things have turned out. I have the best baby girl anyone could ask for. I’m glad I finally decided to write this. I have been for a while. I’m glad to share this experience with you. Have you ever created a birth story? Maybe it’s time to look back. I was scared to write mine because of all that happened, but it is good to look back and reflect. Things do turn out okay. I believe that. ❤️