It’s surreal to think that this year will be four years since I started sharing my journey online. Before then, I was never one to share personal things about my life. I would journal in my many journals, but would keep them all hid away. Not many people really knew what I was thinking or feeling, myself included. I would normally hide my feelings or struggles because I was scared to open up. I was scared of judgement. I was scared of what people would think of me. Not just from my struggles or mental health, but I wondered what others would think about me sharing so much online. It’s become a fairly new thing to share the hardest parts of our lives online. To some, it’s understood as to why we share online, but sometimes it can be met with confusion. I find that many people have different reasons for sharing online. Maybe it’s their way of healing or expression, maybe they want to raise awareness on mental health illnesses, the possibilities are endless… But everyone’s ‘why’ is different.
My Why. For me, my ‘why’ has changed a few times throughout this journey. I started this blog, my Instagram, my Etsy, for me. My way of expressing myself, learning about myself, creating and showing myself I can write about my mental health. No matter how hard or crazy it may be. I never was artistic and painting was something I never expected I would do. I never even liked art and the fact that it quickly became a therapeutic way for me to heal was liberating. Being online and sharing my journey has become a new way of healing and learning about myself. My why, is still for me… But it’s also grown and changed into many things. My why, is also you. The ones who read my blog, my words, who support me, reach out to me, purchase my artwork, share my posts or quotes, is my endless why. Awareness, Love, Compassion, Change, Connection is my why.
My why is me, but my why is also you… because some days, I need you to remind me why I am here. I need you support to help pull me out of the darkness and time and time again. The connections I have made online have given me so much light. I never thought it would be possible to make connections or friendships on a community like Instagram. BUT it’s possible. The ones who support me have helped me more than I have even realized. Lately I’ve been repeating the words from my friends on here. The ones who constantly check in. The ones who give me so much love. The ones who are so far yet I feel so connected and loved by. I never knew how much I needed them in my life, especially when things get hard. I’ll never stop reminding myself of their positive words, because it allows me to be loved. To know I am cared for and that I am worthy of getting better. I am worthy of connections and friendships. No matter what form that may be.
These are just some of the encouraging messages I have gotten while being online here. This is JUST from the past couple weeks, but these humans have either been with me for weeks, months, or years. No matter what, I appreciate it all the same. They inspire me everyday and allow me to be loved. I wouldn’t want to be here without you guys. I’m so glad I created this journey four years ago. I’m so glad I found YOU. I love you. Thank you. For hearing me, seeing me, and supporting me… From miles away. (And some close to home) It never ever goes unnoticed. ♡
Have you ever gotten supportive messages? I encourage you to screenshot them and put them in a beautiful collage that you can reflect back to. It’s easier this way rather than looking back at old messages. Let’s hold onto the LOVE that is being given to us in our lives. There is love here.
PS: My challenge for you today is to allow more love into your life, whether that be in person or online. LET others support you and love you.. OR be that support for someone else. Let the ones you care for, know that you care. & remember, you are loved.