You know.

Throughout life we are always navigating through different obstacles. Some we may know of while others are completely out of the blue. It’s important to have others around us in life. It’s important to let others into your life. I’m so thankful for the people in my life who I know have my back. Who I know I can trust or talk to for advice. We should all have someone we are comfortable to talk about our lives with. This person could be anyone, but really is should first be you.

Lately I’ve been saying it’s important to let others in. Although this can’t fully happen unless you let yourself into your life. If you truly take time to listen to your inner self you’ll be more sure. We always wonder if we are doing things right. We ask for second opinions. We seek advice. Sometimes from a complete stranger. Although I feel we should be connected with ourselves enough that we know what is the best option. I talk to myself quite often and it’s good to have ‘pep’ talks with yourself. In the end you are in control of your life. You may not know it, but you do have control. You do know what is best for you because you know you. Seeking advice is important. I love seeing different sides, although I feel you must first be in touch with yourself. That way you can be sure with what you need or deserve. 

Being aware of your worth let’s you have control of your life or your feelings. When you know you are worthy of something you don’t hold back. You take risks even if you fail. You try even though you may fall. You listen better. Listen to what your mind and heart is needing. Listen to others and most importantly yourself. Next time you are feeling down talk to your inner self. You are stronger than you believe. You know more than you think. You have so much compassion for others and I assure you that you can give that to yourself as well. 

I’ve been taking a bit of a break from social media lately. It’s really nice to just go out and not worry about the online world. More posts will be coming this week though ❤ I’m inspired.

Love yours, 

Michelle Xox. 

Everything changes, even you.

Just like sadness, happiness is an emotion. Feelings change all the time. You aren’t constantly happy at all moments. You are human and you can feel things. Changes happen throughout the day that you don’t prepare for and that is okay. You are alive and you can handle it. I’ve found that the best thing to do is to just feel emotions as they come. Which ever emotion that is. You can’t ever stop sadness, hurt, or worry. Unfortunately those things will happen in life. It’s your choice how to handle these moments. It’s okay to hurt and it’s also okay to move on and feel happiness. Whenever I feel joy I embrace those moments and don’t let go. I remind myself I deserve to feel those moments. Lately, those moments are coming more frequently because I am letting them in. I’m not hiding anymore or dwelling in the should ofs or what ifs. I will admit it’s a hard journey and some days are more productive than others. That’s okay though. I know that my goals, my ideas, my plans will amount to something.

Taylor reminds me everyday that: “Here’s what you’re not. You are not the opinion of somebody who doesn’t know you. Another thing you’re not. You are not damaged goods if you have made mistakes in your life. One more thing, you are not going nowhere just because you haven’t gotten to your final destination yet.” My life has so much ahead of it and I know that for a fact. I am shaping it right now with things I know and learning. Every step that I take will lead me to better things. I trust in that because things are always changing. I know what is best for my future and my life because I know who I am. I know what I deserve and need in life. I will probably make more mistakes as life goes on because I need to. I will face stressful moments or loss or worry. And I will feel all the emotions. Every single one. Because I am lucky to be alive. Lucky to be able to feel emotions and let go ❤

It’s so important to know that our emotions and feelings are changing constantly. Embrace each moment as they come. Stop thinking of the past or worrying about the future. Live for now. Take in the moment for all it is.

Love yours,

Michelle Xox. 

It’s never too late.

Everyday is a new possibility for change. You don’t have to wait until a new year or a new week to make goals for yourself. This was so hard for me and I felt so irritated that I didn’t do things sooner. I would always think of the past and what I wish I did.. But today isn’t too late. You can change your life if you want to. You don’t have to wait around. You don’t have to look back wishing that you did something else. Look around. Look at right now. Take in the moment of today and that you can do anything you desire. 

                                    You can be brand new, but it’s a journey. 

                            Don’t be so hard on yourself, be patient. It will come.

Love yours,

Michelle Xox

I matter, You matter, We matter.

I always want what is best for people. I know that everyone has their own struggles or battles they deal with. Being compassionate and caring is what I hold onto most. I care so much for others and it got to the point where I wasn’t giving myself that same attention. It’s really important to give yourself the same love that you give to others. If you smile and are joyful to others show that to yourself as well.. You don’t deserve to feel lonely or upset within yourself.. Love yourself and give yourself the compassionate and kindness you give to the ones you love.

Throughout life there is always going to be stressful situations. Things that you haven’t even prepared for or thought could happen. There will be hard times, slip ups, and difficult times. Knowing that these exist and no one is perfect can make you realize that showing kindness and compassionate goes a long way.. Giving it to yourself will allow you to show it to others even more.  You are never alone and someone may feel as you do. If they do they may need the same love and compassion that you do. Show them that and maybe you will inspire them to show that love to themselves.

My favourite quote of Taylor Swift’s is: “No matter what happens in life, be good to people. Being good to people is a wonderful legacy to leave behind.” It’s so true. Being loving and kind to others really makes the world go round.. We all really need a lot more it. We need to be more understanding, accepting, and loving in general.. Not just to our friends, families, or strangers but to ourselves. 

We all matter and deserve to feel loved.

Love yours,

Michelle Xox

Holding a grudge, is it worth it?

I use to always be someone who would hold a grudge against someone. Years would go by but i would still be angry or upset about a person or situation. I felt this mostly towards my bullies. I had too many to count and the hardest part throughout my journey was letting go of my hatred towards them. I don’t usually forget things and that can become a problem… I’ve realized that is so damaging, time consuming, and lonely to constantly be angry towards someone. Life is too short to be angry and feel emotions that don’t make you feel good. It has taken me years to move on from what I experienced in high school. It was hard for me to even realize that it was still bothering me.

It’s really important to embrace the feelings, accept that things happen, and move on. I can’t be stuck in my old self and I won’t.. Neither do you. No matter what has happened to you or how you were treated you don’t have be stuck in that place. Likely, those people don’t feel the same way because feelings change and honestly their opinion of you doesn’t matter. What matters is how you feel about yourself. Make yourself proud.

Learning to let go of things you can’t control really helps you let go of grudges. You can’t control how someone else acts but you can control how you act and react to situations. Showing love, compassion, and acceptance lets you embrace someone else and really see their view. Sometimes things won’t work out, but that’s okay. You don’t need to feel resentment towards someone for who they are. It’s their choice. Your choice is to either embrace them or move on. You can’t move on when you constantly feel grudges towards others. Let things go that you can’t control and you will feel completely free to be who are or want to be.

Take a moment today for yourself, you really deserve to take a look into your life.

Love yours,

Michelle Xox

The lowest of low.

– This is extremely hard to write or even gather thoughts for, but it’s so important to talk about. 

I’ve been to some dark places. I never knew places like that could exist until I was in high school. Until I was told to kill myself on honesty box. On facebook, years ago there was an app called honesty box. You would get messages from people, not knowing who it was. I would get many. I hoped for positive things, but it was so negative. If I posted too many pictures of myself I was obsessed and I shouldn’t because I was ugly. Bullying is the hardest thing I have been through, the worst being cyber bullying. You can’t defend yourself when someone remains anonymous. You don’t know who is it, where it’s coming from, or why.

“Kill yourself.” Why would someone tell me this. Why is this still being said to people today.. Maybe they are hurting too? I will never really know..  what I do know is those two words are so powerful and strong. They stab through your entire body making you feel worthless. It’s been years since I have heard this, but it has still come to my mind. It all started in grade eight, when self love wasn’t even an option for me. I didn’t even know it was possible, because the only thing I knew was self harm. It was such a dark place and I never really talked about it. I never really had a plan, to die but I sure thought about it. I hurt myself, not to die, but to feel. To feel the pain I thought that I deserved.. but nobody deserves that. No one should ever feel pain, especially from yourself. 

I’ve never been phyisally bullied, threatened sure but never touched. Although, the words I have been called. How worthless I was made to feel felt like a gunshot to the head. I was completely numb throughout high school. Wondering if there was ever a way I could please anyone, even myself. I’ve realized now that I needed to go through hell to get to the light. To realize my worth, my beauty, my purpose. I remember writing in my journal many time, “Why can’t i just die. Why can’t it just be easy. Why is there so many people I would hurt. People who would care.” As much as I was put down and told I was alone or worthless I knew that there were people who loved me.. Always. That is what has kept me through. 

I’m so glad that I was somehow strong enough to get through that period in my life and for where I am now. I want you to know what if you have ever felt this way or do right now. You aren’t alone. I am here for you. You are not the words of your bullies. You are more than what they say. You know your worth and your purpose deep down, don’t let them hide that from you. It’s easy to just give in or give up, but pushing through is so worth it. Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and all the love/happiness that can come out of it is so refreshing. It’s as if you just shed off the negativity, the pain, the useless words that do not matter!!!! I feel there’s always a constant battle going on within your mind. You are in control of your life and how you feel. It’s that simple. I just hope that you decide to feel happy and let positivity into your life.. I am so glad that I did. It’s changed everything ❤️ 

I never thought I would ever share this, I just hope it helps someone who needs it. My scars don’t define me, they fuel me to do better and never feel that way again. 

Love yours,

Michelle Xox

Blame.

It’s easy to put blame onto others when we feel a certain way or wish things were different. It almost makes us feel better about the situation and leaves us feeling clean or as if it wasn’t our doing. I’ve realized it isn’t good to blame anyone. Even ourselves honestly.. we allow what we think we deserve and that can change in any instant. 

Anything can change and everything does. Weather, time, feelings. I’ve always loved the saying. “feelings change, memories dont.” Its a nice way to look at things as memories are there but you can always change how you feel.Change isn’t easy and it takes a lot of time. Sometimes you want others to change but you can’t ever change someone. They must find that within themselves. And if they can’t you gotta ask yourself can you live with this or move on? Either way, there’s no one at fault really. We both have our different views, morals, and opinions and that’s okay. Life will somehow find a way. 

I’ve learned recently that I deserve so much love and respect. I can stand up for myself and what I know I deserve and I don’t deserve shit. I remember the first time I stood up for myself was in highschool against my bullies. It was so difficult and I’m so thankful I had that strength. Recently I regained that as well and I’m so glad that I did it. I have stood up for myself to both of the men I love and want in my life. It could have ended terribly but I know that it is worth saying. I am worth the respect and I won’t settle for less. 

Love yours, 

Michelle Xox